From the only reliable source of Catholic news on the internet, Eye of the Tiber:
Local priest Father John Ross is being accused of delaying Mass for up to an hour Sunday morning after pausing during the middle of The Presentation of the Gifts to catch a Pikachu, several parishioners have reported.
Ross admitted to the diocesan officials that he was playing the newly released Pokemon Go app while saying the Mass.
“Fr. Ross has admitted to simultaneously saying Mass while trying to catch a Kipachu or Pikachu or whatever,” one official told EOTT early this morning. “It appears as though Fr. Ross located a Pikachu on top of a parishioner’s head, which he was able to retrieve during the Entrance. During the Penitential Act, Fr. Ross made his way down the main aisle and beneath several pews where he is said to have successfully hunted down a Charmander.”
Ross told EOTT that, although he was sorry for his actions, he wished people would understand that he can do two things at one.
“Listen, I’ve been saying Mass a long time. I can say it in my sleep. In my opinion, if I’m just sitting there during the first or second readings and happen to spot a Kadabra or a Dragonite, you better bet your bottom tithing dollar that I’m gonna try and catch it.”
Ross went on to say that his motto for playing Pokemon during Mass was “Catch them all, save them all.”
“There’s absolutely no reason I can’t save souls while catching and training Pokemon to battle for sport. I do admit that at one point after Mass I kinda sorta mixed it up and told a Pikachu that he ought to trust in God more then proceeded to accidentally capture an 80-year-old usher. That was my fault, I am sorry for that. In my defense, he kinda looks like a Groudon.”
Go here to read the comments. PopeWatch contacted the Vatican for comment, but was told that the Pope had a hot tip on an Articuno and was on his way to Outer Mongolia.
This must surely be a joke. With all due respect for the many priests and sincere worshipers, If this is true, I would say it is time to get rid of the hired hands that grace our pulpits today. .This if it is meant to be a satire; is not funny and highly disrespectful. I think it is time for us all to repent and ask for the Lord to please be merciful. I am not a Catholic, but my Father and his family were. This priest was never one of God’s own or he would never would have brought this kind of shame and disgrace upon the Church.
Has the Church gone down to this Level of Worldliness and away from Christ?
It’s satire Lois. God gave us a sense of humor for a reason.
This is satire. Unfortunately there are abuses of the Mass in reality that make this seem tame.