Thursday, March 28, AD 2024 9:35am

PopeWatch: It’s About Time

Late at night at the Vatican.

 

PF:  You can’t expect me to believe this absurdity?

Captain Swiss Guard:  All I can tell you Holiness is what they told me.  They claimed to me to be a film crew, they use another term but that seems to be our equivalent, sent by Pope Sixtus XII from the year 2623 to make a record of events.  They then vanish only to reappear elsewhere in the Holy See hours or days later.  Oh, and they are immaterial.

PF:  What languages do they speak?

Captain Swiss Guard:  They don’t speak themselves.  They have devices that speak around their necks.  The devices speak Swiss to me.

PF:  Isn’t time travel impossible?

Captain Swiss Guard:  It is for us;  it may not be for people living six centuries hence.

PF:  (Shakes his head.)  Sotto Voce:  I should never have accepted this loco job.  Normal voice:  Captain, let us use, como se dice, Occam’s Razor.  Isn’t it much likely that someone is playing a prank.

Captain Swiss Guard:  It is possible Holiness, other than their vanishing into thin air and being immaterial.  They also float in the air, I forgot to mention that.

PF:  Could it be some sort of holographic projection?

Captain Swiss Guard:  I am not an expert in that field Holiness, but if it is a holographic projection it is the most sophisticated one I have ever seen.

PF:  I don’t think they are from the future.  I think it is the loco gringo Yanquis trying to gas light me again!

Captain Swiss Guard:  You are probably right Holiness, sorry to have bothered you.

PF:  (Uncertain.)  What else have they said to you?

Captain Swiss Guard:  Well, when I asked them what they were filming, they said that 2023 was regarded in their time as a turning point in the life of the Church and that Pope Sixtus wanted a complete record.  When they leave our time they are able to make all memory of their visit end in our time, but they were being cautious not to appear before large crowds.  This team is from the Swiss/Martian guards of the future and they were letting me know what they were doing out of professional courtesy.

PF:  Martians?  Is Elon Musk behind this?

Captain Swiss Guard:  Who can say Holiness?

PF:  (Musing to himself.)  Benedict was lucky.  He got out before things got so loco. Normal voice:  Do these people pose a threat?

Captain Swiss Guard:  I doubt it Holiness.  They are either harmless loons or they are who they say they are.

PF:  Well, keep me posted.  I am weary.  We can talk about the Peter sightings tomorrow.

Tape ends.

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Mary De Voe
Mary De Voe
Saturday, January 21, AD 2023 9:37am

“We can talk about the Peter sightings tomorrow.”
Saints preserve us.

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