PopeWatch: Vatican Halts Trading

As a fund raising mechanism the Vatican had started a stock market where the Faithful could invest in notional stocks.  The money invested would be real and the Vatican would receive a commission of two percent of all stocks traded.  The stock market proved quite successful as a fund raising mechanism, and soon various Cardinals got in on the act.  Their favorite stock was Novus Ordo Mass, Inc.  Problems arose when the cardinals began an attempt to short sell Tridentine Mass, Inc, a perennial favorite of the Faithful.  Holy Day Traders around the planet, in reaction to the attempt of the Cardinals, began to buy up Tridentine Mass, Inc., driving the stock price through the roof.  Simultaneously they began to short sell Novus Ordo Mass, Inc, sending its stock price to the cellar.  In short order the Cardinals faced ruination, even of their secret Swiss bank accounts, and appealed to the Holy Father to halt trading.  Pope Francis had not invested in the Vatican market, having previously lost virtually everything he owned by investing in Argentinian War Bonds in 1982, and he was initially reluctant to halt trading, but intervention from the Biden administration convinced him to do so.  And thus began the scandal known as VaticanStop.