News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:
MARTHA’S VINEYARD, MA — Following President Biden’s repeated refusals to back out of the presidential race, former President Barack Obama has reportedly invited Biden out for a nice quiet afternoon of paddleboarding.
Sources allege that Obama was reluctant to extend the offer, but has come to see it as the last option available to the Democratic party at this point, as Biden has remained adamant on keeping his candidacy even in the midst of significant pressure to step down from his own party.
“Hey, Joe old buddy? I didn’t want to have to ask this, but…uh…are you up for a spot of paddle boarding over at my place this afternoon?” Obama asked his former Vice President. “It’ll be just the two of us, all alone, nothing to worry about. I’ve got a lake property way out in the middle of nowhere — we’ll have a splash! We’ve already asked you to step down several times, but you just never seem to be amenable. Maybe we can just talk things over, you and me, on a couple of paddle boards out on the lake.”
“I’m sure we can come to an understanding.”
Staffers say that President Biden was reportedly “thrilled” to accept Obama’s offer and was quite flattered to see that he had been given the nice newly-waxed red paddle board.
At publishing time, Obama had been seen wiping tears out of his eyes and paddling back to shore after a two-and-a-half-hour excursion.
Go here to read the rest. Let us suppose that Biden had a fatal stroke or heart attack in the next few days from all the stress he is under. There would be precious few people who would not suspect foul play.
The ghost of Ted Kennedy is available to take Old Joe for drive by the lake if needed.
Don’t eat the poisoned figs, Joe!
https://youtu.be/hKSHPBE9h4g?si=I6hUTFaWfPeFEAob
Ideal for the Dems would be if someone wearing a MAGA hat could do the deed for them.
Hillary could take him rope-climbing.
“Ideal for the Dems would be if someone wearing a MAGA hat could do the deed for them”
Ha! They need to yell: “This is MAGA country!!” 😀
It’s even easier than that. The media just needs to claim after the fact that the offender was probably a Trump supporter. You still hear claims that Gabby Giffords’s shooter was convinced to do it by Sarah Palin, because she put out a map with electoral districts to be targeted. Nevermind that Loughner was obsessed with Giffords long before Sarah Palin came on the scene and never expressed any political motivations for the shooting, or for that matter that the dems also used maps with “targeting” imagery. The media at the time said he was a Palin supporter, so Palin made him do it.
While this comes up less often now, the height of absurdity came during the Steve Scalise shootings where multiple outlets claimed that it was unclear whether the shooter there had political motivations (despite specifically asking where Republicans were playing, contacting the Bernie Sanders campaign, expressing leftwing political views online, etc.) and said that the political motivations in the Gabby Giffords case were far clearer.