News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:
DAPHNAE, EGYPT—Joseph, Mary, and the Son of God were taken into custody Tuesday morning. Egyptian authorities learned that the Holy Family had violated travel restrictions in their attempt to flee King Herod’s eminent massacre of all male babies under the age of two.
Officer Ptahhotep of the Ancient Egypt Police Force told journalists, “We asked to see their papers and vaccination records, which they could not produce.” He then said the young family had no connections to a rich politician, which also would have excused them.
“For Ra’s sake, we would have let them go if they were buddies with a city council member. But all they mentioned was the lineage of David and some kind of prophecy fulfilled. Sorry, but in Egypt, we deal in real authority.”
The officer explained to the recalcitrant parents that the safest way to protect their child from a murderous tyrant was to stay home, stay safe, and comply with the local laws of said murderous tyrant. Or be buddies with a politician. The three law-breakers were then placed into the back of a chariot and hauled off to jail to await a visit from Child Protective Services, then extradition.
Go here to read the rest. One can see it now if Christ had come today. “Do you have a permit for that gathering?” “Cancel him! Christ called non-Jews dogs!” “He is just a blue collar carpenter without any credentials!” “Hamas has placed a bounty on the head of the young rabbi who is cozy with imperialists.” Trending on twitter: “Christ is anti-Trans because of his claim to be, get this, the “Son” of God!” “No Libertarian could possibly support Christ, the way he is in cahoots with tax collectors!” “Is Christ a mad alcoholic?” National Enquirer: “Christ keeps company with prostitutes: sex tape coming soon?” “The YouTube video of some of Christ’s relatives attacking him has 25 million hits.” “A whistleblower reports that Christ pays his staff nothing.”
Yes, God always knows better. In some ways twenty centuries ago was a less barbaric, and decadent, time.
The sheep have not followed the True Shepherd for a long time and have lost their ability to discern good from bad. The one they follow will be not be leading them into a land of milk and honey.
If He had cured today:
The ten lepers approached Jesus. “Social distance,” cried the masked Apostles, “for we live in fear.”
“Why do you leave your safe shelters and expose us to your ills?” said Peter.
“We seek healing!” cried the lepers.
“There will be no healing, but only a vaccine.” lamented the Apostles.
“Go back to isolation, keep safe and await.”
And Jesus wept.
Brilliant Phillip. The earliest comment of the week in the history of the blog!
Take ‘er awy Sam!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXeIxtI–uc
I rather think that if Christ were to come today, the reaction among our many esteemed bishops and Cardinals, and perhaps even a certain Vicar of IHS, would range from highly disconcerted to downright belligerent.
It certainly would mean the end of their fine dining, interminable world trips, and excellent vacations, plus to have someone looking over their shoulder, and even correcting them, would be absolutely intolerable