Our ursine friend is forlornly seeking humor in this year of punishment 2020:
Probably shouldn’t be saying this, but we’re all stumped, especially on the humor committee.
- We could make fun of Biden, but even Russians have grandpas a couple of ponies short of a troika.
- The Bear’s Coronavirus joke got voted down. (“If the virus mutated as quickly as the story, we’d all be dead.”) “Nyet. People die.” Oh, like you’ve never hearda Bear joking about death. That’s the Bear equivalent of the knock-knock joke. In fact, it’s our very favorite knock-knock joke. “Knock-knock. Who’s there? The Bear who just killed you.” Hilarious.
- Black Lives Matter? If the Bear made a BLM joke he’d be shut down faster than Jeff Bezos can write a 100 million dollar check with “virtue signaling” on the memo line.
- Hey did you hear the one about the Pope? Yeah. All of ’em. Over and over. Talk about a comedian who should have been the first other pope to resign in 700 years. You got bupkis Slappin’ Frank!
- There’s Trump, but he’s funny and he owns it. You can’t out-Trump Trump. He’s kryptonite to gag-writers. Also–shhhh–he’s our guy.
- I guess white people are fair game. Unless they’re Marxists, or heretics, or on some gender spectrum or whatever. You know, like Jesuits. But a normal white guy—a normal anything just puttering through life unnoticed—just isn’t all that funny. Unless he meets a Bear in the woods. Theclassic joke setup. Even so, “A Jesuit is walking through the woods when he meets a Bear…” would be even funnier. Heck, that alone has the Bear in hysterics.
Go here to read the rest. Wait for the presidential debates Bear. Those will be comedy gold to be bequeathed in families as precious heirlooms for generations, especially when Trump reveals that Biden has been replaced with a cyborg, or when Biden reveals, well actually Biden will have fallen asleep by that point in the debate. At any rate, humor awaits and the year is barely, or bearly if you prefer, half over.
Give Bear a chance. He’s just out of hibernation
I am wondering if the Democrats are not serious about this election, but figure they can advance their agenda better with Trump in office as a lame duck beleaguered by endless investigations and impeachment, while none of the mess that started this year sticks to them.