Top Ten Reasons Why Obama is Not Satan

Satan Obama

 

The Internet is abuzz with the fact that Satan on the History Channel’s The Bible miniseries, which has gotten great ratings, looks a tad like Obama if Michele gets him to go on a veggies only diet.  I really don’t see much resemblance but it does give us a good excuse to look at the top ten reasons why Obama is not Satan:

1.  Hell has never run a deficit.

2.  Satan, whatever his other manifest evils, has never voted present.

3.  Satan resides in Hell and Obama resides in Chicago.  (A small difference I concede.).

4.  Satan is the prince of liars, while Obama is at most an archduke of liars.

5.  Satan to my knowledge has never eaten dog.

6.  Satan has never used a teleprompter as far as I know.

7.  The people of the United States have never elected Satan as President, although if God were running as a Republican and Satan as a Democrat in Cook County, I would not like God’s chances.

8.  Satan has never attempted to have the Catholic Church pay for birth control.

9.  Satan gets almost as bad press in the Mainstream Media as the Republican party.

10. Satan does not have a second in command as dimwitted as Biden.

49 Responses to Top Ten Reasons Why Obama is Not Satan

  • Obama may have the same ambitions as Satan, but he doesn’t have the talent.

  • Donald & Mike, thank you for the hilarious comic relief. Just what I needed at this time. “Obama may have the same ambitions as Satan, but he doesn’t have the talent.” LOL. I love that one.

  • Alinsky never dedicated a book to Obama.

  • Hillary Clinton only worked for Obama for four years.

  • Satan created a shovel-ready Job.

  • There is a resemblance. To bad “Dreams from my Father” didn’t have an opportunity to use this actor as the Cover for Obama’s book.

  • While Satan uses Joe Biden for his own ends too, he would find the idea of publicly associating himself Biden too demeaning.

  • Satan has demons with pitchforks to do his bidding. Obama has a bureaucrats with red tape. Oh, wait….

  • No, Donald, Obama resides in Washington and vacations in Hawaii. He is, I have to admit, smart enough to stay the hell (pardon the pun) away from Chicago unless he necessarily has to be there.

    I actually think the Devil portrayal does look like a wrinkled Obama.

  • 11. Satan fell from highest glory to utter ruin; Obama fell from insanely overrated to slightly-less overrated.
    12. Satan retains the inhuman genius of his angelic state; Obama fails basic history.
    13. Satan disputed with and tempted Jesus; Obama ignores Jesus until he needs to win the religious vote.
    14. Satan was always a supporter of same-sex marriage; Obama evolved with the polls.
    15. Satan can appear glorious to behold; Obama has only two expressions: “angry” and “smug.”

  • If Obama were Satan, we could consider an exorcism as an alternative to impeachment. Darn!

  • National Catholic Register of hate-filled racists. Disgraceful – you people do not
    “Love one another as I have loved you”

  • MY comment is awaiting “moderation”!
    You publish hateful speech and deny me
    the right to condemn it? Pope Francis has
    His work cut out for him.

  • All new commenters are automatically put into moderation Claudia as a device to cut down on drive by trolls. Now please explain to me in detail how my post is hateful.

  • Thank you Claudia for showing us how to love one another. Deeply, deeply appreciated.

  • Claudia – did you mean to comment on a different post??? I suspect ‘m not the only blog reader scratching his head over this one.

  • Obama is not Satan.

    He’s just another narcissistic leftist who’s out to destroy and then to rebuild in the Marxist vision.

    And people are suckers his brand of horse manure.

  • Claudia may have Pelosibidenema.
    A contagious Catholic phenomena that supports Anti-Life, Anti-freedom of religious liberty and Anti-constitution.
    They are out there.
    Catholics aren’t what they used to be.
    Pray for her return to decency.

  • Claudia…? Hated filled racists ? So everything comes done to the fall back race argument with you ….,and the NCR is filled with racists? I think not!

  • Claudia……wasn’t your namesake the Roman emperor when Satan’s ultimate enemy was born?

  • “8. Satan has never attempted to have the Catholic Church pay for birth control.”

    No? Who, then, inspired President Obama to do it?

    Let’s laugh at the Devil but let’s not become him in the process. The top reason President Obama is not the Devil is this:

    The Devil cannot repent of his sins. President Obama can. We should pray that he will.

  • @Philip: Let’s also be careful about lumping the Constitution in with life and freedom of religious liberty.

    Life and religious liberty are fundamental rights that all people have and which must be respected in all people.

    The Constitution is a document, made by man, capable of being amended by man, interpreted liberally by man, ignored by man, and abolished by man.

    Let us put our faith in God, not in a piece of paper.

  • “Let’s laugh at the Devil but let’s not become him in the process. The top reason President Obama is not the Devil is this:

    The Devil cannot repent of his sins. President Obama can. We should pray that he will.”

    Amen.

  • philip, equating Claudia with Nancy Pelosi and asserting that she (Claudia) needs to “return to decency” because she’s not a fan of equating Obama to the devil (even jocularly) is a little much, don’t you think?

  • Haven’t we all started taking ourselves a bit too seriously here? One of the biggest problems in this country is the massive loss of a sense of humor. Everybody go take some desensitivity training. Yeesh.

  • He is not Satan, but certainly he is one of his minions.

  • Actually I do not think Obama would qualify for even junior imp status.

    “Your dreaded Principal has included in a speech full of points something like an apology for the banquet which he has set before us. Well, gentledevils, no one blames him. But it would be in vain to deny that the human souls on whose anguish we have been feasting tonight were of pretty poor quality. Not all the most skillful cookery of our tormentors could make them better than insipid.

    Oh, to get one’s teeth again into a Farinata, a Henry VIII, or even a Hitler! There was real crackling there; something to crunch; a rage, an egotism, a cruelty only just less robust than our own. It put up a delicious resistance to being devoured. It warmed your inwards when you’d got it down.

    Instead of this, what have we had tonight? There was a municipal authority with Graft sauce. But personally I could not detect in him the flavour of a really passionate and brutal avarice such as delighted one in the great tycoons of the last century. Was he not unmistakably a Little Man — a creature of the petty rake-off pocketed with a petty joke in private and denied with the stalest platitudes in his public utterances — a grubby little nonentity who had drifted into corruption, only just realizing that he was corrupt, and chiefly because everyone else did it? Then there was the lukewarm Casserole of Adulterers. Could you find in it any trace of a fully inflamed, defiant, rebellious, insatiable lust? I couldn’t. They all tasted to me like undersexed morons who had blundered or trickled into the wrong beds in automatic response to sexy advertisements, or to make themselves feel modern and emancipated, or to reassure themselves about their virility or their “normalcy,” or even because they had nothing else to do. Frankly, to me who have tasted Messalina and Cassanova, they were nauseating. The Trade Unionist stuffed with sedition was perhaps a shade better. He had done some real harm. He had, not quite unknowingly, worked for bloodshed, famine, and the extinction of liberty. Yes, in a way. But what a way! He thought of those ultimate objectives so little. Toeing the party line, self-importance, and above all mere routine, were what really dominated his life.”

    Even Hell hath its standards.

  • JL-
    I disagree.
    Nancy Pelosi speaks for Nancy Pelosi, not the Catholic Church however she has taken that role in the past while holding her high profile position, subsequently misleading Catholic voters to believe that the Church is in union with her position on abortions, not the Churches position. This is the problem with politicians that claim to be Catholics in good standing but in actuality are dissents.
    A return to decency is a call to accept the Churches position on abortion. Any Catholic that is offended by this thread, offended that some may equate the most pro-abort president in our Nations history to the likes of Satan, is a Catholic that hasn’t taken the time to inform him/herself with the reasonings of past Popes and the Magisterium as to the intrinsic evil that abortion is.
    To support this evil is not “love of neighbor.”
    Claudia is wrong to use Pope Francis in this framework.
    All Catholics that support abortion rights are not in union with our Holy Church.
    It is in their best interest to hear the truth, for the sake of their own soul, and the souls of those who commit the acts.
    JL. Some may claim that other issues are as important, but I’m not one. Life is the issue.
    If Claudia is offended by our banter, then excuse me. I’m offended by the Catholics that help secure Satans best worker in Our White House.

  • I guess I have to differentiate myself from other “John”‘s…

    I don’t think anyone who makes fun of the present administration would not agree with the statement, in a sober moment, that Obama needs prayer just as much as Bush did…or anyone else on the globe for that matter. Well…except for……………had you, didn’t I?

    What I fail to see is why poking fun at a coincidental similarity in appearance draws either slanders of racism or holier-than-thou chastisements that this type of humor shouldn’t be done by serious folk. Really?

    “Next up on The Safe For Everyone’s Feelings Comedy Channel: The Modified Accelerated Cost Recovery System Tax Joke Hour“. Well, maybe not…there’s someone in the IRS who might be offended.

    As I recall from high school English class, a certain poet from Italy in the 13th century had the audacity to place even popes in his literary rendering of Hell…and, while it was a work of theology, politics and allegory, I’m reasonably certain it also contained elements of satire and wit in it as well.

    I don’t know what the fuss is about. I’ve seen people point out that Bush looked like a monkey, say that Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI is a fashionista with his red shoes, and that Blessed Pope John Paul II was complicit in the clerical abuse scandal. Me, if I disagree, I shake my head and move along…if I agree, I chuckle and move along.

    Maybe my post is self-negating since instead of ignoring the non sequitur comments above, I should have either added something to the Top Ten list or kept my post to myself rather than address them.

    O Irony! Thy name is com-box.

  • Michael-
    Point taken.
    Today an honest hardworking Christian, a small business owner, feels the hot coals of compliance to a mandate that is not in union with His core. He is punished, (taxed) or he caves in.
    I thank God that the greatest generation that ever

  • ….that ever lived are going to their Eternal reward now.
    How they would shake their heads at America in 2013.

  • Hmmm. Donald has listed a whole bunch of reasons why Obama is not Satan, and others added additional reasons. And for that we are called racists. I guess Claudia is right. I will take Claudia’s side and admit that Obama is Satan. Is that better? Am I sufficiently inclusive and diversity promoting to avoid the racist label if I state that our President is Lucifer? Does that make the United States Hell? I live in the United States. I must be dead. And I must have been really rotten in my time in the world. Oh well. At least we’ve got cheeseburgers here. I was expecting fire and brimstone. What a pleasant surprise.

  • phillip,

    How the heck do you conclude that Claudia is pro-abort from the two comments she’s made? Or that anyone who takes offense to people tongue in cheekily comparing Obama to Satan is somehow complicit in the abortion industry.?Speaking of Pope Francis, do you think he’d approve of this post and the subsequent comments? Probably not, but I don’t see how that makes him in league with Satan. I think you’re making pretty irrational leaps.

  • JL-

    Your nothing more than a bunch of NCR hate-filled racist.

    In regards to you, “Pope Francis has his work cut out for him.”

    The “framework” was that I found it appalling that she would vex “us racists” and use our newly elected Pope to try to shame us.

    JL. By participating directly and voluntarily in the election of public officials that protect, advance or approve grave mortal sin is in my opinion serious matter….President, V.P., House Speaker.( not speaking of Pope, ok?)
    The deaths of these innocent children will demand justice. The support of regime’s that do nothing in their power to protect these innocent lives will be held accountable.
    It is our responsibility to call abortion what it is; a mortal sin that has the consent of our Leaders.
    I’m a racist in her eyes. I’m okay with that.
    Question?
    Can one be pro-life and vote for pro-aborts?
    Anything is possible. Nancy and Joe are great examples. Hope they enjoyed their trip.

  • JL-
    Why would anyone oppose our gifted president, or make light of him or joke about him?
    Why?
    I have over fifty million reasons why.
    They might of entered in to this thread, but they couldn’t. Their sense of humor is like that of Claudia’s. Nonexistent!

  • In Obama’s commencement address to the N.D. Students and guests he stated; “We must respect the feelings of those who do not agree with abortion law, and draft a conscience clause that reflects their beliefs.”
    Enter in Obamacare and the HHS mandate.
    That is par for course.

    Fr. Weslin, God rest his precious soul, was one of the N.D. 88 arrested and hauled off Norte Dame property during the above event.
    Fr. Weslin passed away on May 12th in my home town. He was as courageous as St. Paul, as tender as a lamb and my hero.

    I have taken valuable space to give reason to the ridicule. I’m not meek, nor eloquently gifted in debate and I know I have many faults to work out. Some possibly in Purgatory, however the scourge of abortion on demand
    in this United States must be addressed. If not now, w

    hen. If not our elected representatives, who?

  • I cannot see a scintilla of racism here, just a tongue in cheek jibe at the most left-wing president in the nation’s history. We do not hate him but as an enemy of sorts, we include him, obedient to the Lord, in our prayers.

  • “Why would anyone oppose our gifted president, or make light of him or joke about him?”

    Opps – I thought we were joking about the Obama administration. My bad; never mind…

  • Ha ha ha . . . this is too rich not to relish! The best so far is Mary De Voe’s comment! Subtle and yet biting! Then the new comer – Claudia Johnson specious accusations are much to be enjoyed. Sorry, Donald maybe next time but you can console yourself with the fact that you got this fine post started.

  • philip. “All Catholics that support abortion rights are not in union with our Holy Church.
    It is in their best interest to hear the truth, for the sake of their own soul, and the souls of those who commit the acts.”

    You are right on, brother. Thanks for your great posts. And to answer the question, “can one be Catholic (or Christian) and support abortion-loving leaders? A definite NO!

  • John.
    Thank you.

  • “The Constitution is a document, made by man, capable of being amended by man, interpreted liberally by man, ignored by man, and abolished by man.”
    …not without the consent of man and his posterity. The Preamble to our Constitution is unchangeable.
    “We, the People, of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.”
    The Preamble to our U.S. Constitution states specifically the purpose of our Constitution. While the Law of the Land may vary, be amended, or change with the culture, the purpose of its being does not change or may the Preamble be removed, erased of modified. If the rights and freedoms endowed as unalienable by our Creator can be removed or modified, the people are no longer free, in the freedom created for us by our Creator. I keep using “their Creator” as does the Declaration of Independence precisely because atheists and others have removed the acknowledgement of God from our culture and from the public square.

  • Face it, O is not Satan….but he has earned the “employee of the month award”.

  • Mortality and origin are differences in the two, too.

    The deficit from 1. begs repeating the common warning, ‘You’ll have hell to pay.’

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