https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRR0NlesJy8
Our bruin friend at Saint Corbinian’s Bear likes the latest video of Pope Francis:
The new Pope Video is out, and the Bear has to hand it to Pope Francis this time. The theme is something about indigenous people. Like, leave us alone, unless you’re giving us stuff. But it is by far the best Pope Video yet.
It begins with Daenerys Targaryen, First of Her Name, Khaleesi of the Grass Sea, The Unburnt, The Mother of Dragons, The Breaker of Chains, in indigenous Dothraki dress, stepping up to a podium in an empty hall as the usual synthesized score plays. Soft lighting behind her reveals an indigenous Dothraki royal tent and a servant steps up and begins braiding Daenerys’ hair.
Without speaking a word, she produces a horse heart and consumes it in a montage of very short takes. With her face covered in blood, she addresses the camera directly.
“I have many titles, but now I wish to address you simply as Daenerys Targaryen, First of My Name, Khaleesi of the Grass Sea. I love my loyal indigenous Dothraki subjects, who will soon cross the Narrow Sea in wooden horses along with their mounts.
“I speak for the Sheep People, and the Wildings, as well, and all indigenous folk who do not get a clockwork city of their own in the opening credits. I’m not sure if the Ice Zombies are indigenous, but we’ll include them to be on the safe side.
“The Dothraki ways may not be yours, but they deserve to be respected. Except for that giant dome for ex-Khaleesis, which I incinerated along with everyone in it. Leave us alone. Just like we would leave you alone if I did not have an enormous fleet, Dothraki horse lords, the Unsullied, the Second Sons and a squadron of fire-breathing dragons. Oh, and that dwarf, the eunuch and the old guy with the crush on me. As if.
“Swear obedience to your rightful queen, people of the Seven Kingdoms!”
Fade to familiar “Pope Video” closing title.
Go here to read the comments.
Thanks! The Bear for one welcomes our new Dothraki overlords. Anything would be better than the guy who put barrels of wildfire in the crypts beneath St. Peter’s and destroyed it. But the Bear must wonder. What of the souls of indigenous peoples? “The gods of the heathen are devils.” Not a word. Under the heresy of Bergoglioism, everybody’s good to go. Respect cannibalism. Respect Mumbo Jumbo. And respect the Dothraki, for whom rape and slavery are a way of life. But is it not true that they were serious underachievers until a civilized Khaleesi curbed their worst excesses and gave them a purpose? Well, got to run. Time for my noonday blood sacrifice to The Stallion Who Mounts the World.
The bear wasn’t funny this time.