Thursday, March 28, AD 2024 8:09pm

PopeWatch: Summons-Part II

Swiss Guard:  His Holiness has instructed me to return to Rome with you.

PopeWatch:  Well that won’t be happening.

Swiss Guard:  Pardon?

PopeWatch:  I have many tasks that I must perform with dead lines that will not wait.  I could not take the time to travel to Rome for several months, assuming that I decided to go.

Swiss Guard:  His Holiness warned me that you were, what you Americans say, a hard chest.

PopeWatch:  I believe you mean a hard case.  Not especially, but I have various duties that take precedence to the Pope wanting me to come to Rome for a chat.

Swiss Guard:  What will I tell his Holiness?

Swiss Guard:  Tell him that he has my phone number and he can call me as he has on several occasions.  I would even be willing to do a Zoom conference with him.  Me going to Rome is impossible right now.

Swiss Guard:  His Holiness will not be happy, but that is not a rare event.  Would you sign this receipt for the summons?

PopeWatch:  Gladly.  Had lunch?

Swiss Guard:  It wouldn’t be pizza or fried chicken would it?

PopeWatch:  No, there is a Mexican restaurant two blocks away.

Swiss Guard:  Real Mexican, not Taco Bell?

PopeWatch:  Authentic Norte Mexican cuisine.

Swiss Guard:  You have convinced me!  Oh and Astrid says hello.

PopeWatch:  That was unexpected!

 

To Be Continued

 

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Greg Mockeridge
Greg Mockeridge
Saturday, January 29, AD 2022 5:16pm

When the pope summoned me to Rome, I told his envoy that it would have to be on his dime and he would have waive the vaccine passport requirement. He immediately called the pope to inform His Holiness of my conditions. The pope screamed “Pendejo!!!” and hung up. I don’t think I’ll be summoned to Rome again any time soon.

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