News that I missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:
NORTH POLE—Santa Claus’s nice list is said to be run on trustworthy software, safe and secure on an unhackable server under his workshop.
But some are questioning the legitimacy of the nice list after the tally suddenly spiked in the middle of the night, adding over 138,000 kids to the good side of the list.
After sorting kids according to their niceness or naughtiness for hours, Santa had abruptly stopped counting and gone to bed, saying he was tired and taking a break for the night, even though he is magical and does not need to sleep.
A team of unsupervised elves reportedly continued the counting against North Pole guidelines, and around 3 a.m. there was a sudden dump of over 138,000 kids put on the nice list. The software also switched kids over from the naughty to the nice list at random.
Go here to read the rest. Chief of Computer Security Elf Gabriel stated at a press conference that there was nothing wrong with what was done, that the Dominion tabulating machines worked perfectly and that if Santa does not stop making these baseless allegations that a whole lot of Elves will end up dead based upon threats being phoned into Santa’s workshop at the North Pole. Santa has responded by firing Elf Gabriel, putting his name and those of his collaborators on the naughty list and burying the corporate headquarters of Dominion Voting Systems under a mountain of coal. Never get Santa mad.
The analogy is incorrect. It should have been Good kids removed from the Nice list and are placed on the Naughty list.