Binge watching a Marriott Commercial? Yeah, that about sums it up. A virtual convention takes what has become an increasingly meaningless ritual the parties conduct every four years and turn it into an unwatchable farce. My favorite part in this great wasteland thus far is Bill Clinton lecturing Trump about Oval Office behavior.
The Bee’s take:
U.S.—A new poll has revealed that most Americans would rather jump into a volcano spewing a horde of angry geese than watch another second of the Democratic convention this year.
“I’ll take the geese,” said one man as he turned off the DNC convention after a few minutes of pious lectures, smug presentations, and hypocritical virtue signaling. “At least I will soon die as the volcano of geese explodes in a flurry of serrated teeth and flying feathers, breathing my last as the geese take me into the sweet release of death.”
The Americans polled also preferred falling into a vat of acid, getting run over by a bulldozer, and being launched into the sun to watching another moment of the convention.Â
“Basically, it seems Americans would rather do pretty much anything than watch this thing,” said the head researcher on the study. “Death by llama, getting turned into a newt, and running into an old teacher at the supermarket all ranked much higher than tuning into the Democrats’ online convention this year.”
Go here to read the rest. What is your take? The usual open thread rules apply, Be concise, be charitable and, above all, be amusing.
Democrat Non-Convention Convention Open THREAT to America.
Nothing wrong with running into an old teacher! I am an old teacher 🙂
Two of the four PBS channels available to us have been taken up with this useless farce, I guess reflecting their employees interests. Must check C-SPAN.
It would, by the way, not be difficult for the National Committees to set up a sensible delegate selection system – primaries and caucuses over two Saturdays in June, conventions in August, and a follow up meeting of the National Committees in September. They don’t do it because bloody everything in this country reflects the outcome of three vectors: cheesy vested interests, random perversity, and sheer inertia. (The state governments can prescribe that primaries be held on particular dates, but they cannot prescribe that delegates with voting rights at the convention be chosen at such primaries; perfectly possible for the national committee to prescribe voting delegates in such states be chosen at caucuses in June).
One of the paradoxes of social life in this country is that we have the most productive business sector in the occidental world bar Switzerland, yet we have just about the most ramshackle political institutions therein and trailing only Greece and Italy in the race to see who has the most incompetent and irresponsible political class (I think the characters in charge of Portland, St. Louis, Chicago, Minneapolis, Detroit, Baltimore, and the U.S. Congress may succeed in putting us in the lead).
And our media are just odious. Mr. Sailer today remarks that the Sulzbergers have up a feature story on the alt-Right. I think Richard Spencer’s outfit has one employee. We’ve had weeks of rioting and our garbage media has done no reporting on the financial networks bailing this rabble out of jail every week.
If I want comedy, I certainly won’t watch this ill-plotted farce!