News that PopeWatch missed, courtesy of The Babylon Bee:
U.S.—The nation’s church introverts applauded the Pope for slapping a woman’s hand after she yanked him in and refused to let go.
Protestants and Catholics alike united to praise the Pope for taking a stand against the aggressive extrovert. Though this Pope has been a controversial one, everyone agreed that it was OK for Christians to use physical force to stop outgoing people from attacking them with their greetings.
“I don’t agree with this Pope on most things, but he did the right thing here,” said Andrea Vagras, a church introvert from Seattle. “Honestly, he’s emboldened me to slap the heavens out of those old ladies who insist on moving in for a big hug, what with their giant, scary hats and way too much perfume.”
Go here to read the rest. Slapping is a bit much. Perhaps introverts could designate an extrovert to do all greeting duties for them. Mrs. PopeWatch could much better handle Sign of Peace duties than PopeWatch ever could.
I could get behind the slap of peace.