Well this comes as little surprise:
The Pope at the Vatican today issued an apology for the victory of the Holy League at Lepanto on October 7, 1571. “All those poor Turks were seeking to do was to get to Italy. How much better if our predecessor Pius V had organized a grand reception for them, meeting the Turkish forces with open arms and Christian charity and humility. Why the whole course of human history may well have been changed for the better.” The Pope also lamented the attribution of the victory of Lepanto to the intercession of the Virgin Mary. “The Blessed Virgin always stands for peace and mercy, and not for war and what Man calls victory. Our predecessor no doubt had his heart in the right place, but what he did by proclaiming the feast day of Our Lady of Victory was near blasphemy.” The Pope then proclaimed that October 7 would henceforth be the feast day of Our Lady of Perpetual Defeat on which day Catholics will say rosaries in reparation for the many non-ecumenical sins Catholics have been guilty of in waging wars of aggression against the followers of the Religion of Peace.
Then PopeWatch awoke from his nightmare. Well, sort of.