Bear Growls: Predictions

Thursday, April 20, AD 2017

 

 

Our bruin friend at Saint Corbinian’s Bear gazes into his ursine crystal ball:

 

The Vatican may be a rhumba of rattlesnakes, but too few of them are motivated by aberrant ideology to risk a repeat of Sampson’s after-dinner show for the Philistines.

Bear predicts there will be the usual polite language when Bergoglio go-goes, but inside, most prelates are going to be saying, “Boy, did we elect the wrong guy. How could we have been so stupid? Let’s get back to normal ASAP before the Bear hops a tramp salmon freighter and cleans house, but good.”

The Bear does not think the institutional Church enjoys turmoil. Nor does it wish to court schism, however small the risk. And, who knows? Perhaps there are 10 righteous men in Sodom-on-the-Tiber.

The next pope will be a reliable Italian. This whole darts-at-a-map thing has not worked out very well. His job will be to settle the hens down after that fox Bergoglio is gone. The era of the magisterium of the sound byte will be over. Everybody has seen what a disaster it has been.

Nobody likes to be made fun of incessantly.

There will be the usual suspects agitating, but the Bear repeats, institutions do not enjoy chaos. The mainstream plus the faithful will out-vote the cardinals of questionable orthodoxy.

The Bear does not think Bergoglio was voted in over a desire to extend Holy Communion to divorced and remarried persons. The Bear thinks he was elected to be the outsider that would fix things. Perhaps he even ran for pope on that platform. “I’m from Argentina. And if there’s one thing that Argentina is known for it is fixing problems with institutions.”

 

Go here to read the rest.  It is intriguing how opposite side by side Popes frequently are.  The Cardinals do seem to often react against the prior Pope in the choice of his successor.

3 Responses to Bear Growls: Predictions

  • “The next pope will be a reliable Italian. This whole darts-at-a-map thing has not worked out very well.”

    Well Cardinal Raymond Burke of the United States, or Bishop Athanasius Schneider of Kazakhstan, or Cardinal Robert Sarah of Guinea would each make a great Pope. But my vote doesn’t count.

  • “Argentina is known for fixing it’s problems. ” Oh, that is funny!
    Argentine churrasco is proof God loves man and wants him to be happy.
    There is the tango, too. After that, Argentina is chaos.

  • Agreed Lucius – all those would be great popes, but I don’t have a vote either, and I fear perhaps another liberal – Schoenborn perhaps?