20 of my Dadisms
Ah, Dadisms, the short hand that many fathers use as they attempt to navigate life with their families. Here are some of my favorite:
1. Clean up this dump!
2. You are not going outside like that!
3. When I was young and dinosaurs ruled the earth…
4. I’m proud of you!
5. Always get it in writing.
6. Can’t I trade you in for a new kid?
7. Because I said so, that’s why!
8. Did you ask Mom?
9. Take this twenty, it might come in handy.
10. Careful, there are lots of loosely wired people out there.
11. Every night say your prayers before you go to sleep.
12. Kindness and a sense of humor go a long way.
13. Get a haircut Shaggy!
14. Turn down that noise!
15. Remember our family motto: Get someone who knows what the devil they are doing!
16. Smartest thing I ever did was to marry your Mom.
17. Fight you demons fight! I can’t stand peace!
18. Let me know if you need help.
19. Speak up!
20. Christ in His mercy will see us through. (This one I usually say silently to myself during tough times.)
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“No blood, no foul”
My dad always makes lame puns (I picked it up from him).
Wait until you have kids Valentin. You will constantly find your dad’s words coming out of your mouth!
i like # 17 the best
I got one that from my Mom Anzlyne!
“No you can’t have an ear ring. Do you want people to think you’re a gay bob?”
But they both got one – did it themselves with a needle.
5 years later, they both let the “hole” grow over – no ear rings from the time they were 22.
(That was my 2 sons, of course)
“Dad, can I get my ears pierced?”.
“Yes honey, of course you can.”
See how fathers are biased toward their daughters.
“When you turn 18, have a job and pay your own way, then you can please yourself. But while you’re living in my home, eating my food, you’ll do as your mother wants – just like I do”
OT: Donald,
I started a new blog for Federalists, Conservatives, Catholics – see here: http://sardonicexcuria.blogspot.com/ – it’s basically a link concatenator. TAC has already made a couple of appearances. Similar to the Pulp.It, but with less of a religious focus.
–Jonathan
This one is from my Mum, when my older brother and I were still at home, 20 ish, and slept in the same room.
7.15 a.m. Sunday morning.
Door opens.
“Get up you boys, time for Mass. Pooh !! this room smells like a brewery – I hope you weren’t drunk – you’ll have to get to confession.”
Aren’t Mothers also a Godsend?
Yes Don mothers are the people you can count on to wake you up when you should, without regrets, and when you don’t want to.
Great Jonathan! I will add it to our blogroll.
Don I think my children might be a little more embarrassed by me making jokes about accents, becaushje I have the tawent of shounding chineje.
Donald,
Thank you!
–Jonathan
Some of our family’s Dadisms:
“Every time you step on the brake, you wasted gasoline.”
“You just gotta jiggle it.” (About anything that isn’t working)
“Everything breaks sooner or later. A hinge has only got so many swivels in it, a switch has only got so many flips in it, etc. It’s called planned obsolescence and everything has it!”
“So… how’s it going” (out of nowhere even after you’ve spent the last 96 consecutive hours together)
“Are you going to remember this moment forever?”
“A present will make someone smile, but a GIFT will make them cry”
Something which my great grandpa used to say apparently in German (this doesn’t make much sense on the face of it) “to get a ham you need to throw in a few sausages” and that means that if you want a good outcome (the ham) you need to put in good effort(the sausages).
There is a difference between “know” and “do”! Usually said after the umteenth time he was told “I know Dad!” but nothing was actually done.
Best advice I ever got from my Dad was almost a throwaway comment in a conversation: “Never get so attached to any _thing_ that you can’t just up and walk away from it.” Wise man…